The Onion is not a financial news organization - in fact it is not news at all - it's satire. As such we normally would not write about "news stories" that appears on The Onion, but in the case of a recent article about America's bubble-hopping economy, the joke was just too spot on to pass up:
A panel of top business leaders testified before Congress about the worsening recession Monday, demanding the government provide Americans with a new irresponsible and largely illusory economic bubble in which to invest.
'What America needs right now is not more talk and long-term strategy, but a concrete way to create more imaginary wealth in the very immediate future,' said Thomas Jenkins, CFO of the Boston-area Jenkins Financial Group, a bubble-based investment firm. 'We are in a crisis, and that crisis demands an unviable short-term solution.'
The current economic woes, brought on by the collapse of the so-called 'housing bubble,' are considered the worst to hit investors since the equally untenable dot-com bubble burst in 2001. According to investment experts, now that the option of making millions of dollars in a short time with imaginary profits from bad real-estate deals has disappeared, the need for another spontaneous make-believe source of wealth has never been more urgent."
We Need Another Bubble And Fast
The Onion is not a financial news organization - in fact it is not news at all - it's satire. As such we normally would not write about "news stories" that appears on The Onion, but in the case of a recent article about America's bubble-hopping economy, the joke was just too spot on to pass up:
A panel of top business leaders testified before Congress about the worsening recession Monday, demanding the government provide Americans with a new irresponsible and largely illusory economic bubble in which to invest.
'What America needs right now is not more talk and long-term strategy, but a concrete way to create more imaginary wealth in the very immediate future,' said Thomas Jenkins, CFO of the Boston-area Jenkins Financial Group, a bubble-based investment firm. 'We are in a crisis, and that crisis demands an unviable short-term solution.'
The current economic woes, brought on by the collapse of the so-called 'housing bubble,' are considered the worst to hit investors since the equally untenable dot-com bubble burst in 2001. According to investment experts, now that the option of making millions of dollars in a short time with imaginary profits from bad real-estate deals has disappeared, the need for another spontaneous make-believe source of wealth has never been more urgent."
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